NEW  ARTICLE

How I started my search for My Family History.

                                                                          Deborah Ashton

Too many moons ago....

The story starts with my father, he worked erecting the electrical pylons that you see all over the country.  My mother and later me followed him where ever he went.  I later found this strange as neither could drive and I often wondered how they moved from place to place.

                                                 My father,  Derek Grunsell

I was born in Lancaster general hospital and spent the next few years moving around, my brother was born in Corby.  This event was not a joyous event for me! I took, as my mother said “a great dislike to this little baby brother”, in my words to her “I want a sister”.  My poor brother unfortunately never grew on me until much later.

     The poor little brother Stephen and unhappy sister

 My mother used to tell stories of my brothers younger days.   Please bearing in mind was only 3 years at the time he was born. One story was I took my brother from the pram and hid him in the bushes in the garden and would not tell anyone where I had put him for over an hour. 

Other stories were every time we were allow out to play, a very stern warning was given “Make sure you bring him home, or don’t bother coming back yourself”. This was because I did tend not to bring him back; I would leave him at the shop. At the play park another time. And the pattern continued.  The older I got the more I resented the fact that I had to look after this boy I found an intrusion in my life.  Let’s not forget that he did get his own back several times.  I was pushed off my bike several times, hit and kicked, but the worst was the Hammer found in the garden that connected with my head giving me several stitches.

One afternoon while in the garden, as lady came to visit who turned out to be my grandmother, my mum’s mother.  We could hear lots of shouting and talking, and my grandmother didn’t stay very long, not surprising.   I have since found pictures of me as a little girl with my Great grandmother Alice so my parents must have had some contact with my mother’s family.

  Alice Ruth Vaughan

  Sometime later when I was just about to go to secondary school my mother got seriously ill and was in hospital for a long time.  My father tried to juggle visiting, working and looking after us two, but neighbours weren’t happy and before the police could take us away we were taken to Dover to his family. Where we were separated and not allow to see each each. 

This was a very unhappy time for both of us which I think brought us together finally.  We tried several times to run away but didn’t get very far as we were staying in the middle of several other houses that had other Uncles and Aunts as there were seven siblings.  

The more serious my mother’s illness got the less we saw my father.   One afternoon we were taken to the hospital to be tested, we took this opportunity to tell my mother and the nurses how we felt and how unhappy we were.

 A few days later while back at Dover. The lady that had visited one afternoon turned up with my mother’s brothers and sister.  I remember the huge rows to this day.  I just couldn’t believe how this woman stood up to my father’s siblings, we had only met this woman briefly, but she wanted us and was not going until she got us! 

My brother and I were taken to Chartham to stay with my granny and granddad.  This was one of the best summers of my life.  We felt loved and safe. So much had happened in such a short space of time.  My granny made us feel happy again. Thankfully my mother got better and came to stay also for some time.    Plans were put into place and we moved from Medway to Canterbury. 

Unfortunately my granddad died not long after. I enjoyed being with my Auntie and Uncles and didn’t think much of anything just loved being part of a large family.  And felt greatly at home in this little village. Little did I know, a great deal of my family history was in this village. The closer I got to my granny the more I understood that this family had had lots of problems in the past; she had another son that was in the army and never came home because he didn’t like his brother. No one talked about what had happened, but I was happy and didn’t think to ask too many questions. 

Years passed and everything was comfortable.  Just before my 21^st birthday my mother died suddenly and Life would never be the same again.  At the funeral there were several older people who I didn’t know but understood they were family, but I was too upset to take much notice.  Life at home took a turn for the worst again.  My brother went a little off the rails and I took the role of parent.  My father was grief stricken and began to drink heavily. 

But just before Christmas I met my future husband and a whirlwind romance began.  We were engaged in the April and Married the September a year later.

 My husband Peter and I

 And our first child was born the following June. 

My granny was over the moon she was a great granny!             Constance and her great grandson Nicholas

 I had stayed very close to my granny and was devastated at her death, a year later. This was the time I felt I didn’t know who I was and wanted to find out.  I really didn’t know very much about anyone.  At the funeral I started to asked questions,  and everything went from there I  later started to collect certificates.     

What a can of worms I had opened!   I visited all my mother’s siblings and got as much information as I could.  But I wasn’t just happy with that.  I started my husband’s family as well and an even bigger can of worms began to open.   I now understand that Families are very complicated and can be separated by simple misunderstandings that can last for many years.  The thing I find the most up setting is the lack of photographs and memories that have been kept.

How can anyone throw out this type of information!  I have now become somewhat of a hoarder and keep everything.....

During my searches and over the many years I have met and had the honour to be related to lots of wonderful people and even mended some bridges.

My granny’s long lost son Philip has given me lots of information and we talk regularly.                                                     3 generations –

Philip and John are Constance’s Twins and Alice Vaughan is Constance’s mother.

I have seen and spoken to my father’s siblings and they have also given pictures and information to complete the big picture, and we get together regularly.

  My father’s family.

The family history programme I use is Family tree maker, this has helped to collect all the information in one place, but I still keep a paper copy because about ten years my computer crashed and I lost all my early information, but luckily having a paper copy I was soon back up and working.

As of January 2010 I have in my family tree, 3368 individuals, and the earliest birth date is 1500, which gives me 17 generations and 693 different surnames.  I still have lots of gaps and information to find but finding the time is hard now.  Due to many family and work commitments.  But I still carry out small searches and talk to other family members that I have intrigued with information that has now caused them to start searching their part of the tree so I have help on several sides.  My biggest wish is to have a giant family reunion, one day I may win the Lotto and this dream could be true.

Many things have changed, in the early days I travelled to churches, record offices, and libraries to collect baptisms, marriages and census returns but now with technology you can sit at home and delve in years gone by.  I am now beginning to sound old.  But no I am just looking forward to more information technology.   What fun....?

Deborah Ashton

My wonderful family, being silly as normal.

Nicholas, Danielle, Eireann,  Deborah,  Liam, and Peter